Everything Else

Last Friday my wife and I reenacted our yearly ritual of showing up for the opening day of the Puyallup Fair.  It seems about 30,000 other people share our ritual.  Despite the large crowd, we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.

Fair logic is an amazing phenomena.  People will consume food combinations within the fairgrounds that they would never consider eating anywhere else.  It’s as if the fair exists in a deep fried, parallel universe.
There is no other sane justification for fair food consumption.  “So hey, what did you guys eat yesterday?”

“Oh, we started the day with a big bag of kettle corn, then we ate a couple corn dogs, followed by a big bag of cotton candy.  Then for lunch we ate burgers smothered in onions, followed by a dozen scones, then a couple bars of taffy, and an elephant ear.  To wash it all down, we drank neon green slushies from a giant flashing mug.”

Although this is an attempt at exaggeration, in reality, many of you are saying “That sounds about right.”  As long as you’re at a fair.  If you ate like that anywhere else, you’d be ashamed of yourself.  At the fair, over consumption is a badge of honor.

In fact, I don’t really trust anyone who even tries to make healthy fair food choices.  If your significant other orders a salad at the fair food court, you’re probably going to need counseling.

Ironically, the exhibit halls are full of pitchmen hocking healthy products and gadgets.  Even so, you might buy the juicer, but you’re gonna hide it in a bag while scarfing down your waffle cone.

I’m in the middle of a diet right now, so I didn’t eat that bad this year, but. . . I didn’t eat that well either.  Come on!  It’s the Puyallup Fair.